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  • Writer's pictureMegan Filoramo

The epic self-love series: Part 1

Wouldn’t it be great if someone was willing to overlook your minor (or major) slip-ups?

Wouldn’t it be great if someone thought you were great, even with your human flaws?How do you feel when you love someone, not romantic love but the love of someone like a child, parent, best friend, or sibling?

How does it affect you? How do you act or feel?

Are you willing to overlook minor (or even major) slip-ups?

Do you think the person is great, even with their human flaws?

Do you find yourself wanting to pay attention when you are with them, instead of tuning out or being distracted?

Do you think about what they want and need?

Do you go out of your way for them? Are you willing to help them out, even when it’s uncomfortable or inconvenient?

Do you worry about them when something seems off?

Considering all these things can make the idea of self-love more palatable.

Wouldn’t it be great if someone was willing to overlook your minor (or major) slip-ups?

Wouldn’t it be great if someone thought you were great, even with your human flaws?

Wouldn’t it be great if someone thought about what you want and need, was focused on you and was willing to help you out, even when it was uncomfortable?

Wouldn’t it be great if YOU could do that?

That’s what self-love looks like. It doesn’t have to be telling yourself how beautiful you are or making time for a manicure (although I support that too). Self love, true, transforming self love means treating yourself with care and concern.

Everyone deserves being treated with care and concern. Yup, even you, especially you.

True self love means actually taking what you want and need into consideration instead of rushing past it or pushing it aside. It means not being distracted or tuning out when you spend time with yourself… WHAT?!?!

So many of us struggle with self-love because we tell ourselves it’s impossible, or too time consuming, or will take away time and love from someone else. Sometimes we tell ourselves we aren’t worthy of it.

What if none of that was true?

We don’t HAVE to disregard ourselves. That is a choice, one that we don’t even realize we are making, a choice that has negative repercussions on everything in our lives. The first step toward self love is to not hold our previous choices against ourselves (AKA overlooking that slip-up).

You may wonder why this even matters. Can’t you get through life NOT doing this?

You can, and initially I was going to point out the cost of doing so, the feelings of underappreciation and dejection.

BUT, instead, let’s look at what there is to gain by working on this whole self-love thing. It’s so much more motivating to look at the benefits with anticipation rather than the cost with shame.

How much more energy do you have when you feel supported?

How much mental chatter is silenced when you feel satisfied, acknowledged and heard?

How much peace do you have when you know you don’t have anything to prove to be valued, when you know that if you mess up you won’t get a mental beat down?

Are you seeing the vision?

Self-love isn’t about thinking you are better than others, it’s about valuing yourself and your contributions to the world, no matter how imperfect. It’s about letting go of inadequacy and shutting down the naysayers (especially if you are your own naysayer).

I am dedicating November to self-love, will you join me? Can you guide yourself through your daily decisions and actions by asking “what would I do or decide if I was doing this from a place of self-love?” If there is one thing I know to be true it’s that increasing love is never a waste of time. It always improves the state of the world… and your own personal experience in it.

I know you know how to love people. I know you know how to care for people and make hard decisions for a positive outcome. I know you know the benefits of a patient believing in themselves, believing they have what they need, believing that they can thrive despite hard times.

Let’s become the nurses who can do this for ourselves. Let’s see what happens if we try.

P.S. If loving yourself, just as you are now, seems totally out of reach, click here and lets schedule a time to discuss how we can fix this together.

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