How to Find Peace When You’re Always Preparing for What’s Next

Stop preparing, leave yesterday behind, and pause tomorrow. 

Do some art

See a show

Read a book

Do a puzzle

Lie on the couch and be cozy.

Bundle up and go outside for a walk.

Color or build something with legos.

Have coffee with a friend

Take some luxurious time to stop preparing. I know, there is so much to do, cookies to be made, kitchens to be cleaned, gifts to be wrapped.

I was struck by a conversation I had with a mental health colleague when she told me about an elderly client who had said he spent his whole life preparing. 

I didn’t have to ask what she meant; I could instantly relate. I, too, am always preparing for something: a family gathering, a holiday, a conference, a work project, a lecture, meals for the week, something with the kids.

The truth is, I am really good at preparing things. I can host a meal for 25 as easily as for 5. I can check things off a to-do list with vigor. A body in motion stays in motion, and I am a body in motion.

Until recently. 

This conversation put words to the concept I had been trying to capture. While I have been actively working on being present and mindful, the struggle to capture peace remains. Checking something off the list means you move on to the next item on the list. I prepared for the next item.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I am not advocating giving up all responsibilities or activities. I really value hard work, focused work. Yes, I prepare for conferences, AND yes, I enjoy going, connecting with people, and speaking. But even at the conference, I am preparing for whatever is next. Yes, I am happy to host holidays, but I am always looking for what needs to be done next to keep everything going. I am a do-er. Maybe you can relate. 

It is a busy season for many of us, with the end of the year in sight and holidays around the corner. What would happen if we take a minute or two away from preparing? What if you took a whole afternoon? (I can see some of you starting to sweat). Could you explore what happens in your mind and your body when you take a few minutes to do something simply for the joy of it, something that serves no productive purpose? Can you just be with yourself?

You can’t borrow from rest.

Sure, I could suggest we all get more sleep (and I do), but there are a lot of challenging factors that can affect sleep, some of which aren’t a quick fix. Fortunately, you don’t have to increase your sleep to increase your rest, to signal to your nervous system that everything is ok, to restore yourself, and be part of the life you are so busy preparing. This isn’t meant as a judgment; it’s meant as a gift.

Take a pause, no matter how brief, to appreciate all the things you have prepared and to breathe for a minute before moving on to the next thing. Stay a few minutes at the end of the workday to chat with a friend. Sit inside Starbucks and take 10 minutes to have your fancy coffee rather than pulling through the drive-through. I promise, your life will not collapse.

Give yourself the grace to step into your own life, not just get ready for it.

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If you’re tired of preparing and ready to gently create real change, I’m here to help. Reach out for 1:1 coaching, and together we’ll step into the version of you who no longer waits to live her life. Schedule a time to connect today Megan@NursingBeyondtheJob.com