Sometimes self- love isn’t rest.
Does this sound controversial? It CAN be rest, but it CAN also be taking action.
Sometimes self- love is doing something that feels hard, for the greater good.
And the greater good can be you.
Take exercise for example. Sure, we all know we should exercise for our overall health and wellbeing. We know this deeply enough that we may even feel guilty about NOT exercising. However, doing something because we SHOULD is often not motivating enough to drive action. Anyone who has ever had an unfulfilled New Year’s resolution knows this to be true.
But love is motivating.
If I told you that you had to up your exercise game just 3% to ensure the health and wellness of someone you love, would you do it? Would you tell yourself that just getting started with taking the stairs or walking for 10 minutes a day isn’t enough or would you tell yourself that it’s exactly how people start?
Would you be willing to do the work to become the person who does those things regularly so you could then increase your capability and protect the one you love. I know you would, this is just another manifestation of the core values that led you to nursing in the first place.
So can we shift that motivation, driven by love, to ourselves?
The beautiful thing is, loving yourself just starts with a language shift. It starts with expelling the word SHOULD from your vocabulary and trying out the phrase, “I love myself enough to ____________ “ (fill in the blank).
I love myself enough to make my lunches for the week on Sunday.
I love myself enough to say no to the extra shift.
I love myself enough to sit in my car for 5 minutes, listen to my favorite song, and take some deep breathes before going into the house after work.
I love myself enough to shut off Netfilx and go to bed.
I love myself enough to clean the bathroom on Monday night so I don’t have to do it on the weekend.
I love myself enough to keep putting myself out there to help other nurses, even when other things come up.
I love myself enough to not criticize the work I do.
I love myself enough to get to work a few minutes early so I can get situated before my first patient.
I love myself enough to give myself some time to process my emotions before firing off an angry email (whether or not I am right).
I love myself enough to keep trying new things, and enjoy the experience, even if I fail.
All those sentences would be different if I substituted “should” for “love myself enough to”. Take the last one for example. I should keep trying new things, and enjoy the experience, even if I fail.
That sounds awful, self-critical, AND unmotivating: all from changing just 1 word.
Language is easy to change.
Change your language and the way you feel will change.
Your feeling of love will grow and all the actions that you have been avoiding will be so much easier.
The only thing you SHOULD do, is love yourself. Love yourself enough to try it 😊
In loving yourself you will find it so much easier to love and care for others.
And that makes everything better, especially work.
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