“Burnout, at its core, is the impaired ability to experience positive emotion. Positive emotions help us make meaning and recharge our batteries.” *
…an impaired ability to experience positive emotion. How does that sit with you?
It sounds a lot less harsh than some other definitions of burnout. This palatability is more important than you might think.
While some nurses are fully aware of their burnout, many resist the “diagnosis” due to the feeling of shame or inadequacy that can come with it. It is imperative that this changes, that the narrative around burnout changes. If burnout is pushed away, it can’t be addressed.
Burnout is NOT the result of doing something wrong. It is not the result of insufficient strength. And, believe it or not, it isn’t just the result of staffing issues.
Burnout, like many other conditions, has multifactorial causes AND multifactorial solutions. Like other conditions, it may wax and wane.
But we won’t look for those solutions if we don’t believe we are experiencing it, if we resist claiming it as part of our true lived experience.
It’s ok to be burned out.
It’s ok if you are experiencing an impaired ability to experience positive emotion.
It’s ok. You aren’t alone and there are lots of things to do to start to feel better.
First, it may help to think of it as an experience instead of a diagnosis. Sure, this may just be semantics but an experience seems so much more manageable and potentially transient.
It may be beneficial to draw a parallel between experiencing burnout and “experiencing” COVID.
I have had COVID multiple times but the first infection was by far the worst. I was, in my experience, incredibly sick for 3 weeks with residual fatigue and activity intolerance for a solid 8 weeks after. I am aware that compared to many others’ experience, this is not bad, but my personal experience was quite distressing.
Burnout can be the same, it can have varying intensity and duration. It can look different from one person to the next.
It doesn’t feel good.
By week 2 of COVID, I was starting to feel hopeless. What if this never got better? What if I didn’t regain my cognitive capacity? What if I could never walk up the stairs without shortness of breath?
This is what burnout can feel like. What if it doesn’t get better? What if I am always going to feel completely spent by the time I get home from work? What if I never regain the ability to feel happy?
Like COVID, you may have recurrent, less severe experiences of burnout. Knowing this can normalize the experience and empower you to
Not panic
Not judge yourself- you didn’t pick this (just like you choose to get COVID)
Start gently stacking the odds in your favor for a speedy recovery and to prevent further “infections”
No, burnout is not your fault AND there are things we can do to help ourselves.
Get enough sleep/rest. Don’t roll your eyes. This means making a conscious effort to improve your sleep. Have you ever made a sleep plan? It’s more than just going to bed (although this may be the hardest part- don’t start another episode, chapter, or reel.)
Pick a bedtime and set an alarm on your phone. When it goes off, remind yourself that this is how you take care of yourself, that your tomorrow self will really appreciate it.
Avoid caffeine after lunchtime (yes, you read that right). Sometimes just staying hydrated is good enough for afternoon fatigue.
Avoid sugar after 5pm (so sorry).
If you like to watch TV, use blue light filtering glasses and don’t pick a show that is too suspenseful, remember, you are trying to down-regulate your nervous system. Don’t ramp up cortisol and then try to go to sleep.
Decide ahead of time what you are going to do if you can’t fall asleep or you wake up at 3:17 am every morning. A guided meditation app or music can be very helpful to go to sleep. For the 3:17 wakening, here’s a script that may help you if you repeat it to yourself.
“It’s ok that I am awake. Rest is good enough. I am in a good place to manage everything.” Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. The last sentence is helpful for the crazy racing work thoughts. And just remember, if you went to bed at 10pm instead of midnight, you already have 5 hours of sleep under your belt.
Try this for 2 weeks. You wouldn’t skimp on sleep if you had COVID.
Use your brain to find the good things.
Make a list of ten things you are grateful for every morning.
Challenge yourself to find 10 NEW things every day, no repeats.
This uses your cognitive skills to improve your emotional experience. Not making the list doesn’t mean you aren’t grateful but when we are experiencing burnout, the negative thoughts demand center stage. Don’t let them call the shots. You are super smart, use that brain to force them aside for a moment. A gratitude list is an easy task that can really help reset your mental processes.
Connect with someone.
Burnout, like COVID, can be very socially isolating. In an effort to not expend any extra energy, it is common to become withdrawn. We mistakenly use it as a coping mechanism. It can happen without even noticing.
Make a plan. Pick whoever is easiest to connect with and decide when you will connect with them. Deciding on a specific time, ahead of time, increases the chances that you will follow through.
Allow yourself some flexibility on what this looks like: calling your mom, setting up a time to take a walk or getting dinner with a friend, texting someone out of the blue, sitting by your child while they do homework (if they let you), staying a few minutes late to chat with a coworker. There isn’t one right way.
There ARE concrete steps to combating burnout. Just these three will provide a huge return on investment. From this place you can expand to more. We don’t have to start with all the strategies at once.
The priority of treating burnout lies in the priority of protecting our capacity to experience positive emotions. We can’t let it be, we can’t just wait and see what happens. Start with these 3 steps and start experiencing restoration.
Are you too overwhelmed to even start with these things. I know how that feels because I have been there too. If you don’t have the strength to do it on your own, please reach out. I don’t want you to suffer any more. I know you don’t want to either. Click here to schedule a time for a consult call. This gives us an opportunity to look at your personal experience of burnout and come up with a plan that will help you feel better, once and for all. Your hour won’t be wasted.
*I believe this statement, which may be paraphrased, was said by Bryan Sexton at the Healthcare Burnout Symposium I attended a few years ago in Manhattan. It was an excellent conference if you ever get a chance to attend.
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