It's heavy because it matters

Life is pretty serious.

The work we do is pretty serious.

So why are we surprised when it feels heavy?

We wait for inspiration. We dread fatigue. We find our rhythm for a while, and then life throws us a curveball. Suddenly we're wondering how long we can keep doing all of this.

It's all okay—not because our healthcare system is okay. It isn't. But because our experiences are part of being human.

Our connection with patients and our shared goal of helping them heal—that IS the point. Even when staffing is short. Even when your inbox is overflowing. Even when all the kids are home sick.

Our interactions with our coworkers with the common goal of helping people are the point.

It’s ok if sometimes we feel like we can’t keep up, that we are pulled in too many directions.

I’m just here to reassure you today.

This is a season that we all go through periodically; sometimes the season is long, and sometimes it takes us by surprise.  The comfort lies in knowing that it is a component of our lives and not the entirety of our reality.

In behavioral health, there is a therapy called Acceptance and Commitment Therapy. I became familiar with this in my work in pain management as this particular approach can be very helpful for individuals dealing with chronic pain as their reality.

The central idea of ACT is that our suffering often increases when we fight against our internal experiences. Instead of exhausting ourselves trying to eliminate difficult thoughts or feelings, ACT encourages us to accept what is outside our control and choose actions that align with our values. Acceptance isn't giving up. It isn't settling. It's recognizing that we can build a meaningful life—even while discomfort is present.

The same can be true for working in healthcare. Like living with chronic pain, healthcare work asks us to show up day after day carrying things that are often heavy. There are great moments, but there are also days that demand enormous emotional energy—and recovery afterward.

This idea of accepting what is can feel invalidating or powerless, but I encourage you to give it a go. If you're struggling anyway, what might you gain by trying a different approach?

Accept that the work is hard and that sometimes it wears you down. Accept that some days it is going to be even harder because of the other things that are happening in your life.

Remember that you ARE handling it. Ask yourself with compassion, “What can I do to help you through this?” – yes, I actually want you to talk to yourself AND then answer yourself. The answer may surprise you.

Maybe you need some rest. This may be tricky, but if you were to figure it out, what would you do?

Maybe you need to know that what you are going through is normal and you are not alone.

Maybe you need to remind yourself of all the good you are doing and not let the narrative of despair run through your head unchecked.

This is normal.

The goal isn't to get rid of every difficult thought or emotion. It's to make room for them without letting them pull us away from the life and work that matter most.

You are going to be okay. This season won't last forever. Give yourself a little grace.  Focus on the meaning behind your work. Commit to your values, even on the hard days. Little by little, you'll discover that the weight you're carrying doesn't have to define the life you're living.

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If you’re in one of those heavier seasons, it may help to have a place where you can step back and make sense of it all. In my one-on-one coaching, I work with healthcare professionals on exactly that—finding steadier ground while staying connected to the work that matters. Reach out to Megan@NursingBeyondtheJob.com